Movies, they always give people what they hope for eh?

Girls will always wish that the playboy they meet will turn into someone faithful, playboy will always wish that they could just meet that special someone so they could put more faith into love, and all the other losers will hope that some day they would get lucky and score once in a while.

I've just watched Ghosts of Girlfriends Past with a friend and it happen that I was in a similar situation, though the setting and story line is a lot different yet the characters are all there, the alpha male, wingmen and preys. I just couldn't figure out why I'm always one of the wingman and not the one under the spot light. Do I really allow them to take the spotlight because I lack self confidence? Or deep down inside I know that I doesn't need or crave for those spotlight because I'm so confident that I'd meet someone that see my glow in the dark? Somehow that kind of person doesn't come as often as I wish, and funnily my glow ain't even strong enough even when I'm in the dark cinema.

What's more fuck up is that I shouldn't even feel this way! Din't I said I've already give up on this one? Now I'm here typing all this crap after a few pines of stout and a few glasses of JD? How suckier can this be? Like the tag line of the movie said, you can't always run from your past, I could try to act as if I din't care anymore, but I do somehow. I could let go, but deep down inside, I know I regret every single mistakes I've made, hate ever opportunity I missed, and mourn over everything that I couldn't get. Okay mourn could be too harsh but I couldn't figure of anything else more suitable.